A close friend of mine is in a new relationship. She told me that sometimes, it feels like walking a tightrope. Sometimes she’s balanced and sometimes she falls off.
This got me reflecting today on new love and the metaphor of tightrope to describe the feeling of it. It can be a vulnerable thing to open one’s heart to another human being. Certainly, it can take a while to learn how to love one another well. One goes from single to couple and the negotiations begin. Maybe one person minds if socks are left on the washroom floor and the other doesn’t. Or maybe the discussions are of a bigger nature: to mix finances or not to mix? The point is, it is a LOT to consider and the transition can be overwhelming. As I walked around my neighbourhood, I realized that we all fall off that tightrope in learning to love others and ourselves better. It is as it should be. If we never make mistakes, how do we learn? The thing that keeps it all afloat is remembering to put on the harness before walking the rope. To me, the harness is the grace of forgiveness. If mistakes are inevitable in life then learning to forgive ourselves and others becomes a really important skill to cultivate. How can we understand one another unless we communicate- even and maybe especially the hard things to admit? How can we communicate from our hearts unless we forgive and create space there? Perhaps the most important place to start is inside ourselves. I know that when I can forgive myself, I have a lot more room and compassion for others as they create their own blunders on their journey through life. What do YOU want to forgive yourself for? What are some ways you have been able to forgive in the past? How can you pull those skills forward? I wonder what beauty you will be able to add to your relationship with yourself and others with all that spaciousness that is left behind in your heart where the old grudges and hurts used to be…..